mediocre, at best...
Life as a mom can get you down so easily.
My 2 year old’s face was dirty again. Craft time simply looked like blank paper and crayons plopped on the table for the third day in a row. Lunch was peanut butter and jelly for far too many times this week. Our big adventure yesterday was a simple walk around the block. My 4 year old daughter wore the stained shirt because I forgot to spray it with Oxyclean before washing it.
Everywhere I turn, I’m reminded that I am doing a mediocre job - at best - to keep this household running.
I don’t throw beautiful, Pinterest perfect birthday parties. I haven’t cooked a meal from scratch in weeks, and I don’t catch all the beautiful moments that are happening right before my very eyes, because I feel weighed down by responsibility. And that is what really gets the ‘mom guilt’ flowing.
How is it that I’m working harder than I’ve ever worked before, and yet I still feel like I’m receiving a big fat “F” on my Homemaking & Mothering report card. Okay maybe not an “F”, but definitely no better than a “C”.
embrace the little wins...
As mothers in a fallen world, we have the tendency to criticize ourselves in every single way that we fall short. The jobs are too many and we are just one person trying to hold it all together. We try to meet everyone’s immediate needs while also trying our hardest not to lose our own sanity. Yet, no matter how hard we paddle it feels like we are headed up stream with raging water working against us.
Nearly every single item on our “to do list” gets put right back on the list for tomorrow, even if we were able to cross it off today.
The relentlessness of mundane chores that take away from my ability to be the kind of mom I want to be just adds to the feeling that I will never measure up. Discouragement often seeps in and I wonder why I even bother. It feels like the outcome stays the same whether I try or not.
But here is what I’m noticing amidst all of these feelings of inadequacy. If we measure our worth and success by every task that’s been left undone, we will always fall short. We can’t allow ourselves to get caught up in how much we aren’t doing, but embrace the little wins throughout the day. Rejoice when we experience that moment when the toddler cracked us up because he put his shirt on his legs and did a goofy dance. And savor that precious time when you looked up from the stack of dishes and found your 4 year old giving the baby a toy and a kiss.
where the magic happens...
For every feeling we have of being a mediocre mom, we must teach our brains to remember that God does not see our role as a mother in a mediocre way. In between sweeping the floors and the diapers is where the magic happens. It’s where we build deep heart connections with our children. It’s where we lead by example. It’s where we get to choose what “to do list” to put value in. We ought to value the “to do list” that revolves around raising children with hearts and minds ready to love and serve the Lord. Not the list that bogs us down with things of much less eternal value.
Mama, you are not mediocre because things don’t look as neat and tidy as you’d like them to. You are the one whose hands they reach for, even if you aren’t perfect. You are the one they want to tell their stories to. You are the one they glance at for approval and admiration before they jump off that stump. Nothing about the time you spend being there, around your kids, and available to them is mediocre. It’s actually miraculous. So eat that peanut butter and jelly sandwich for the fifth day in a row with pride! And let the stain on her shirt remind you that it was made while she was being creative. This homemaking and mothering gig is not about reaching perfection, but about transformation. Transforming our own character as well as our children’s. We are in the never ending process of turning chaos into order in all that we think, say and do, and that my friend, is FAR from mediocre.
Veronica is in the thick of raising littles after giving birth to four beautiful babies in four years! She and her husband recently moved to Michigan to settle and raise their family after starting their marriage in England! When Veronica isn't chasing children and fetching snacks, she enjoys being in nature, sharing a meal with friends & family, and enjoying a cup of coffee and quiet time with God. Veronica has written more on the topic of motherhood - you can check out her book, The Motherfly Effect, on Amazon!
Photos provided by Cate Autumn Photography. Headshot provided by Veronica.