I will trust You...
When I haven’t the strength even to stand,
I will kneel; I will kneel at the cross.
On my knees, Jesus, I lift my hands.
Here I cry, at the foot of the cross.
Help me, Lord, hear my cry.
Hold me, Lord, give me hope.
Your grace to me do not deny,
Carry me when I can hardly cope.
God, you are faithful and just,
You’ve never failed, you never will.
When I’m afraid, in you I will trust.
In the storm, you whisper, “peace, be still”.
I’m hurting, Lord, I don’t understand.
This burden, too heavy for me to bear.
Help me, Lord, please hold my hand,
And I follow you, no matter where;
Through the valley, across stormy seas,
Down the painful road of loss.
Wherever it is, find me on my knees.
Forever I’ll kneel at the foot of the cross.
about the poem...
This poem came to me when I was at a point of brokenness. When all I could do was go to my knees and cry out to God. In the summer of 2022, I went on a camping trip with my church. During the same time period, my family was facing a hard trial, full of many unknowns that had to do with my mom’s health. We were right in the middle of waiting for test results, that could have brought us news that no one wants to hear. The possibility of my mom having cancer weighed on me, my sister, and my mom while we were on this camping trip. One night, the “what if's” hit me, and suddenly I was overcome with such fear of the future, of the unknowns, of what may have been coming with the test results we were waiting for. I shed many, many tears that night. Spent hours weeping, praying, processing. That night, I was outside, crying in my mother's arms, and she said to me, “Look where we are standing.” I looked up, and I did not understand. She pointed to a tall wooden cross that was on the campground, right next to us and said, “At the foot of the cross.” Later in the night, I did the only thing I knew to do with my brokenness- I wrote. I poured my heart onto a piece of paper, in the form of not only a poem, but a prayer- inspired by that cross.
surrender my fear...
Tears fell, as I wrote, as I prayed, as I thought. As I considered the possibilities of what road God may have chosen for me to walk. Finally, I knew I had to surrender my fear of what lay ahead. I had to surrender every “what if” that was so burdening my heart. I had to surrender to whatever road God had for me and my family to walk- even if it were the painful road of loss. And with that surrender came supernatural peace.
Weeks later, after an incredible amount of prayer, I got the news… my mom’s tests came back okay. She was okay. God answered my cry at the foot of the cross, He miraculously granted our plea. How great is our God! And now I have this poem, as a reminder of how He brings beauty from ashes. In the good days, and the bad… forever I’ll kneel at the foot of the cross.
Kaitlyn is a resident of Michigan. She shares her home with her parents and two siblings, although she has a total of six siblings altogether. For Kaitlyn, home is wherever her family and loved ones are. She nurtures a deep passion for both writing and volleyball, which bring her great joy. Nature holds a special place in her heart, from the ocean's majesty, the stars' brilliance, the beauty of sunrises and sunsets to the animals of the earth, she is filled with awe and wonder as she beholds the splendor of God's creation.
Photography by Carly Kristin Photography and Kaitlyn Walsh. Headshot by Victoria Counterman, SaraRose Photography.